should be...

i should be reading this







not watching this...
i am just so addicted to House!!! His wisdom in solving puzzling cases is just so amazing, and not forgetting his sarcasm too :P i remembered i started watching house one year ago, few weeks after uni starts, and i gave up after one episode because i couldn't understand a single word from there.

but now, i am really loving it, some of the episodes are really like revision. it is like....when the guy in the movie mentioned some terms, i will go like...ahah! i know this! =)
leishmaniasis...sleeping sickness.. angiogram...encephalitis...autoimmune disease...and so on.

but, there are still so many terms that i have yet to find out. i know watching dramas won't help me to get through exams, but hey, i am watching medical related dramas ok! :P

''Everybody lies,the patient is lying,but the symptoms never lie."

or watching this....


check out this old movie by Heath Ledger. he was only 20 when he acted in the movie. but oh boy, look at the way he smiles.. :) :) :) awwww....

''don't make anyone make you feel like you don't deserve anything.''

a series of unfortunate events

The world may appear to be an unfriendly and sinister place
but believe me, there is much more good in it than bad
all you have to do is to look hard enough
the series of unfortunate events,
may in fact be first step of the journey.
~Lemony Snicket's, A series of unfortunate events~

sometimes, all things may seem to be ' not right ' . this is when you would have the feeling of helplessness. at this point, everyone will have the intention to give up, to let go everything.

recalling back this one year in uni, many of times i feel like giving up. i have always wondered, will all the hardships be worth it at the end of the day? afterall, what i want in life is to be happy and to be free from worries. why choose the difficult path? i guess, it is not a matter of worth it or not. life would not be complete without hardships. and it is all this experience, that makes me who i am today. and i realised, with each challenges that i faced, i emerge stronger.

and i am thankful to have optimistic friends around me, supporting me always with all the encouraging words, telling me that everything will be alright at the end of the day. no matter how hard is the situation, as long as you face it with all your heart, you will be able to overcome it eventually. how i hope i can grow to be more optimistic. this i must learn.

everyone is saying this:

let go and move on.

but i can tell you, it's not so easy! ( well , at least for me , or else i wouldn't end up in such a pathetic situation as now ) how i wish there is a 'delete' button or 'rewind' button in our life, that we can choose to remember things that we want, and the rest shall go to the recycle bin. but i guess, it is all this bits and pieces of memories, regardless whether it is happy or sad, sweet or bitter, that complete the whole jigsaw puzzle right?

i am starting to contradict myself. haha. anyway, i shall learn to let go. my dear friend who lend me this movie, a series of unfortunate events , we shall learn together :)

what you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened,
it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment.
and this is the moment that you can choose to make everything new.
right now.

and to add on, enjoy the moment! :)

portugal is playing against germany tonite. both are the teams that i like. argh!

yet another waterfall on father's day :)

Happy father's day =)

Been away from home for the past 3 years during father's day. and finally, this year, i am at home :) many people have been asking me, how do i celebrate this father's day? my answer, i don't normally celebrate father's or mother's day. to be able to be at home, accompanying my parents is the best gift in the world. and i think this is what all parents want the most.

today, allowing my dad to rest for a day, i took over the job as chauffeur. and we went to a waterfall. i just so love waterfall :) and i miss those weekends that we , one family, went picnic at waterfalls, beaches, and parks. those were the stress-free days.

yet another waterfall :)


playing with the water :)

Happy father's day to all dads.

There's one sad truth in life I've found
While journeying east and west -
The only folks we really wound
Are those we love the best.
We flatter those we scarcely know,
We please the fleeting guest,
And deal full many a thoughtless blow
To those who love us best.
~Ella Wheeler Wilcox

dad, thanks for everything and sorry for all the mistakes that i have done, and all those times that i made u worry,forgive me for hurting u.
i am who i am today, because of you.
And you're someone whom i look up to no matter how tall I've grown (though i am still shorter than u now :P )

dad,i know u will most likely not be reading this, but i really hope that you are happy always, and i pray for your eternal health.

New love

if u still haven't noticed by now, i have been posting a lot about mountain climbing, waterfall, runs........ lately. some of my friends even asked me, why this sudden change? why this sudden love for nature?

The beauty of nature. something which is so hard to explain till you experience it yourself. one year ago, if you were to ask me to go mountain climbing, waterfall etc...you would get a NO straight to your face. but now, without a second thought, the answer is YES :)

peace of mind.

its all i need.
its what city people need.
sometimes, the hustle bustle of daily life in the city can drive people insane.

i remember. during eos preparation month, it is the tranquility of the park that is keeping me sane, giving me the motivation to continue with the battle. the walks/jogs in the parks were the biggest luxury that i could ask for during that period. i love the parks and the company.

'If nature were not beautiful, it would not be worth knowing,
and if nature were not worth knowing, life would not be worth living.'

being able to appreciate all these wonders that mother nature has got to offer, i am truly grateful. who knows what will happen in 10/20 years time. human civilization and development have greatly threatened natural environment. but its inevitable. will nature still be as beautiful as now? i hope yes.

love. nature.

oh yes, happy birthday Meen Yee :)

runway

Life
Is like a runway
Long
With lots of hurdles
But eventually
It will come to an end

Driving on the highway allows me to have plenty of time to think, and to reminiscence.

When you feel that you are slow, you just need to step on the paddle, the car will accelerate.
And when you feel that it is too fast, similarly, you just need to step on another paddle, the car will decelerate.

How i wish that life could be that simple, that everything in life is within our control.

Unlike driving, we can't control the rate of our life. how fast things are. or how slow things are.

And unlike highway, there isn't any signboard along the route of life directing us to the destination we want. And most of the time, there isn't U-turn in life. once u have made you decision, you will have to stick with the consequences regardless whether you want it or not. This is life.

A friend once told me, he does something because he wants, he cares and he can. that is definitely an ideal situation . but sadly, that is not the case for me, many of times, i do something not because i want to, it is because i have to or because i am obliged to. this is life. this is my life.

klang gate 2

went up to klang gate again. a different group of friends. a different scenery. a different experience :) i totally love the pics that we have taken, its just like those u see in postcards, thanks to jh's pro camera and camera skills :D

and one day after klang gate, i took part in 16hours relay for life, organised by national cancer society of malaysia. i was very tired that night, but for some certain reasons, i ran like crazy in the dark. during the 30++ rounds of running around the track, i had a lot of time to think, about my future, about so many things that happened recently. somehow, i realised, things just don't always turn out the way that you hope. but to be happy in life, i must really learn to look at the positive sides. i guess it is so easy to say than to execute right.

Gunung Dato

As promised, i shall post something about my hike. whoever who said that this hike is going to be relaxing and easy, dun trust their words. i would say the trail is very tough, even tougher than GBH. because the whole path is like 70 degrees all the way up. not even a single piece of flat ground. how great right! but...everything is worth it. the scenery on the up there is spectacular. both sunset and sunrise:) some of us went up to the peak at night time and oh boy, it was so cold up there that i didnt sleep the whole nite. and adding to the fact that i kept sliding down from the uneven rock, i am amazed that why i didnt bother walking back to the base camp to have a good rest. but nevertheless, i really enjoyed the hike :)

Pictures paint a thousand words.

sunset

top of the world :)

beautiful sunrise

me and jeannie :)

post eos

time flies. one week ago, i was still locked in the bukit jalil prison studying for my very first major exam. and now, i am slacking around, wasting my time like nobody's business :P eos results will be out in 2 days, we cant do anything about it, so let's just pray hard that everyone will do fine :)

when i recall back the two weeks of studying, the only word that i can think of is stress. i am stressed not because of the exam, i am stressed because i am not studying hard enough for the exam. somehow, the motivation is not there. but i really have to thank my friends and family who are always there supporting me and giving me tons of motivation. and not forgetting all the 'fuel' for for me to continue to study...the pulut hitam from wy, banana pie from hy, chicken soup from xy,barley from jeannie,different types of fruits from rm, and also many many lunch meal from my sis in law :) all these may seem to be very small, but i am truly grateful :)

anyway, after we finished with ospe, me,lq,jeannie and peggy went out for desserts :) thereafter, being purposeless as i am, i decided to follow along jeannie and wy for a football match between chealsea and man u. i am not exactly a football fan, but i do watch football every now and then. haha, i still rmb i was so crazy about football for one period that i watched every single match during the world cup period. but that was like 6 years ago :P and all the players that i like, eg oliver khan is even retired already. haha. back to this match, it is really nice and DRAMATIC. haha. i shall not elaborate more because all those u can read it from the news. but yar, watching football in mamak is really very different from watching at home. with so many people around me shouting, the atmosphere made me enjoy the match more :)

the match extended till around 6am in the morning, and this also means that i havent been sleeping for more than 24 hours!!!!! this is really my first time. and despite being soooo tired, we headed to mcd to discuss about our penang trip in july. oh yes, did i forget to mention, we are going to penang, langkawi and kedah in mid july. i am soo looking forward to it. after mcd, we rushed back to sch to meet up with dr ranjit to consult about our COP.

and after that, i met up with kh and brought her around imu. and i laugh my head off when wy and xy said that me and kh look alike. hahaa. sorry la, but i really don't think we have anything in common except that we both have 2 eyes, 1 nose and mouth :P we went to 1u to meet up with ee and jh and had lunch at vietnam's kitchen. we had a great time catching up with each other. but i was really too exhausted and was stoning half of the time.

since i violently object the idea of watching movie, we went to ee's house at sieeramas to play cards. his house is super super super nice. and yes, the nicest part is the bed. haha. i slept straightaway when we reached the house while the rest of them were playing bridge.and at nite, we went murni to have dinner and it was very nice and not as expensive as william's.

the next stop is at jh's place. me and kh stayed over at jh's place that nite and we had pillow chat before we all fall asleep. and initially we planned to wake up early the next morning, but haha, guess what , we woke up at 11 plus and yea, just nice for a brunch :P

and u think i will take a rest after a month of studying and 3 days of post eos celebration, u are so wrong :P on saturday, i went to a hike at gunung dato. more details will be posted on next post.

more pics of klang gate :)

Klang gate

yep, conquered another mountain today, its not exactly a mountain, but more like rock climbing :) which i really enjoyed despite the fact that i only slept 4 hours+ the night before. although the climbing part was really challenging, it is really some new experience that i will recommend my friends to try. and i really want to thank both barath, for not abandoning me this time ( unlike in GBH :P) and also rm for helping me all the way up to all the 6 summits :)

look at the spectacular scenery :)

red packet ppl :P

thereafter klang gate, we presented our gift to the birthday boy after making him perform some funny dance :P

the birthday boy
someone who is so nice to all the people around him, someone who kept saying 'its my fault' when talking to me, someone that will never say no to other people's request, someone that can be so serious at times and can be such a joker at times.

look at how he secured the birthday gift :P

baby

he is so cute right? but a bit moody,yep. as shi hoay said, like mother like son. haha :) :) :) nope,nope, this is not my son, and i am not going to be a mom anytime soon. but i am going to be aunt soon!!! :D my sis in law is pregnant! cant wait till the day to see that small cute little creature. eheh :) with some luck, the my nephew/niece may even share the same birthday as me. let's pray hard yea :)

with eos in 4 weeks time, i think people around me are really stressed. i am stressed too, not because i am too stressed studying. but because, i am not doing what i am supposed to do. me and wy came out with this conclusion after questioning ourselves why we are stressed! i should really wake up and work really hard!

something that jeannie wrote on the post-it for me, penang food, langkawi beach, friends, chatting, having fun. adding on to the list, probably taman negara? haha. and hopefully waterfall and touring friend around kuantan :)yep, all those are soo inspiring. but i cant seemed to be motivated. ah! go go go!

orange. waterfall. friendship

Orange run!!! i ran my first 9km on last sunday. well, not exactly ran 9km, but at least i finished the race. i am so proud of myself. i think i have changed so much that i myself don't realise. it is very true to say that the only thing that is constant is change. Things change, people change, and the world is changing too. anyway, one year ago, if u were to ask me to run a 9km race, i will just laugh my head off because i think it is something that is impossible. but ever since after the GBH climb, i really think that nothing is impossible. i did so many things that which i thought i will never do in my whole life ever since after the climb. back to the race, i really thank hy, jeannie and sy for accompanying me for the whole run :)

me,sy,jeannie,hy at the starting point:)

yay, at the finishing line :)

Impossible is nothing!

thereafter the run, rm suddenly asked if we want to go to waterfall. i have been longing to visit a waterfall since after summative. of course i wouldn't say no. haha, so we headed to the waterfall which is somewhere near selayang. somehow, the park gave me the impression of riverside of kuantan and brings back lots of childhood memories.

anyway, we did some hiking before reaching the waterfall. there are few waterfalls there, and although they are not as nice as the one in GBH, i am really grateful to be able to visit the waterfall. the peace. the serenity.the tranquility. are what i need most now. i feel so much better, calmer after all the emo moments at the waterfall. a big thankyou to rm for introducing us to such a nice place :)

ws,rm,jeannie,hy

first waterfall

i love this pic a lot:)

bliss

after waterfall, yesterday, i had a long heart-to-heart conversation with a friend. it wasnt anything big, but i am really glad to be able to talk so freely with someone,sharing everything and at the same time listening something deep down in him. the mere two hours has strengthened the friendship between us, and i really treasure this friendship and its something that i wouldn't trade with anything in the world :)

of satisfaction and disappointment

satisfaction

i feel really satisfied today, not because i finish studying any single page ( or even single slide) of notes, but because i think i did something good :) this morning, after sweeping and mopping the whole house, i went to chow kit. haha. dun get it wrong, i went to chow kit for some community work, not errm.....i shall not elaborate more. anyway, this is not the first time i am visiting children's home, but somehow i really feel satisfied today. and i really pay my full respect to the person in charge there. the way he speaks to the children, the way he is educates the children, and his passion and love from inside, the maturity of his thoughts, all these, are what we need in today's society. so despite of the disappointment, i am actually grateful that i spent my saturday in a meaningful way :) and yea, the pan mian at chow kit is really nice!!!! heh, thats the reward after the community work. i shall visit chow kit on a weekly basis, provided that i can cope with my studies.

disappointment
i was really disappointed yesterday. i don't know why i can so easily be emotionally affected. just one little small thing, and there goes my day. to others, it may seem to be a small thing, to me, i think that this little small things really count. first and foremost, i think people who know me well realise that i hate people who are not punctual. erm, this is not the reason that i was disappointed yesterday, but anyway, i just want to mention it. heh. erm, yep, i really think punctuality is very important, especially for us who are going to save people's lives in the future. i mean, why do people not realise that every second counts? you can be late when meeting a friend, but i think everyone realise that how bad the consequence is if you are late for a emergency rescue.

and yep, the second thing that really disappoint me is that people who doesn't keep their promises. it's so easy to make a promise, but it's so hard to keep a promise. so i will not normally promise people anything unless i am really very sure that i can do it.

heh, i shall not sound so err..emo? haha. i think this word is like becoming so popular nowadays. everyone is using it anytime anywhere :P haha. and i think people are finding excuses just to be emo. hahahaha. i was actually very emo yesterday, but after chatting with jeannie for like 5 hours, i felt slightly better :) ,altough it was such a solemn conversation. haha. sorry ms jeannie for bothering u for so long last nite. heh. paiseh.

and yep, i am going for 9km orange run tomorrow. haha, i hope i don't lost my way and end up in curve coz the run is around that area :P

ill

i am feeling really sick now. but i am not really sick, as in i am having all those signs that i am going to be sick. its worse than getting sick. ah! i am pissed. with so many things.

i am pissed i couldnt wake up early this morning. but the clinic visit was alright :) in fact, the clinic is even bigger than pd hospital. haha.

and i miss home so much now. contemplating whether i should go home this weekend.

and i am pissed with myself that i duno how to prioritize. and wasting all my time in doing nothing useful.

and i am pissed that i have to do pbl

and i think that i am getting darker and darker, for no reason.

and i think something is very wrong with the hormone level in my body.

i need an escape. from everything.

random

i shall be random because i am feeling very lazy now. so i shall post some random stuff about myself.

~i havent been studying since after summative when i am supposed to
~i just came back from a run and feel really satisfied
~i am deciding whether to go for a 9km run this weekend
~i am hoping to go to a waterfall this saturday
~i am happy because i made someone happy today :) :) :)
~i went for the dance competition today, to watch of course, haha, and the perfomances were awesome
~i hate doing systems' pbl because it is so content based
~i watched 27 dresses on friday
~i wasted all my time facebooking
~i love sweet corns and potato currently :)
~i miss those good time in singapore
~i have to wake up at 6am tmr to go for the clinic visit
~i shouldn't be wasting my time now

ah!! help, i am so not focus. and eos is really near. ah ah ah ah ah!

singapore trip :)

it was fun , tiring and memorable :) the schedule that i have planned was slightly different but anyway, it all turned out well. initially, i was supposed to have breakfast with kh when i reached singapore. but there was some delay at woodlands checkpoint so i headed back directly to mcnair to collect some stuff that sl left for me.

then after, i went to harbourfront to meet jeannie. and we spent the whole morning taking pictures at vivo. haha. so typical of us :P and after kh finished with her sign language training, she came over to join us. she is still the blur old kh, no change since the last time i met her 3 months ago :)

we went over to ikea to have lunch with yn coz kh has been dying to try to famous meat ball in ikea. haha. but to my dissapointment, the meat ball is made of pork and beef, so i have to resist myself from eating it although it looked so tempting. sigh.

after that, we went to queensway mall to get my sportshoe. i am happy with the shoe that i bought after 2 hours of walking around in that mall, although it looks similar to my old sportshoe. apologies to kh and yn for walking around there purposelessly together with me.

we went to kh's hostel there after to put down stuff and headed to newton for a free french buffet dinner. much gratitude to yn :) and as usual, the guys, ws and ee, were late for half an hour. sigh. but we had a great time together at the buffet and also at newton food court where we had ice ice ice ice and ice :D i love ice! erm, except the durians one which kh had. haha :P

then we to our 5 stars hotel aka yn's room to check in :) her room is really big, i mean compared to my current room. haha. went around ntu to disturb people. hehe, including lau and yy. it has been so long since i last saw both of them, i would say nothing much has changed. heh.

the next day, we went to nus. sometimes i wonder how will everything be like if i were to choose to stay in nus 8 months ago. sigh. i should stop dwelling about the past. anyway, it was really a small world that on our way to raffles hall, we met gideon :) haha. he is still the same, with his bushy hair and baggy shirt, rushing to church. we were all teasing about his gf :P haha. i am really curious how his gf is like.

haw par villa is our next destination :) i have always wanted to visit this place because i remember clearly that since young my mom has threatened to bring me to this place to be punished if i tell lies. coz there is this 10 levels of hell thingy in the park and for each sin one commit, there will be really cruel punishments. i think the park is not bad, considering that it is free entrance :)

went and have lunch with gid at harbourfront food court. as usual, he kept teasing me and i think i am used to it already. and yep, i got to eat my favourite mee pok there as well. yummy!! i really miss mee pok la!

and our last stop would be my favourite shopping haven in singapore, bugis :) of coz, we all bought something at bugis street :D hehe. and before leaving, we had tau fu fa at the famous rochor road tau fu fa, and trust me, its really nice :)

yep, thats all about my trip down to singapore.i think the best part of the trip is to be able to meet so many friends, and also seeing them so settled down with their uni life. i am really happy for them :) and i really want to thank kah hwee and yen nee for accompanying me to everywhere that i wanted to go , despite of their really busy schedule. and i hope u guys enjoy it as much as i did :)

heh, sorry for the long and boring post, coz i wasnt in the mood to update.

Post summative

phew. summative2 is finnaly over:) i cant believe i have to study so hard just for that 1hour and 15mins paper. but anyway, i am quite thankful with my results, considering the fact that 2 weeks before the exam i was still busy with my orientation stuff.

talking about orientation, i am proud to announce that my group, the oneders, emerged as the overall CHAMPION in the whole orientation. i am really very proud of them, topping in treasure hunt, telematch, and signature hunt:):):) though i think i will enjoy the whole orientation more if its after my summative. but i think winning the orientation is not the whole main purpose, it is the friendship that u will gained after the orientation is more precious. looking back at 6months ago, i was there at their place, and now here i am, an orientation officer for the new batch. but i really appreciate the friendship that i yearned from both the orientations. and yep, i am glad to say that i am starting to enjoy my university life:) (to kh, i think we are slow adapters la :P haha)

anyway, looking forward to the trip down to singapore:) it has been around 8months since i last stepped into that island. so many things have changed since then. hmm, anyway, i shall enjoy the trip and do all the shopping that i want.

life vs death

went for hospital visits. we went there by bus. its embarrass to admit, but i am actually really afraid of taking bus -- bus phobic! ah well, i will have to overcome that because i still have to wait very long before i can have my own very car. sigh. so, on our way there, instead of sleeping, i was reflecting on many things.

for one, i think life is really very fragile. have been encountering so many deaths recently. and in the ward two days ago, someone just passed away right infront of me, after 30mins long of resuscitation. that makes me wonder, human is so powerless. and human is not any better than a robot. robot will not function without the battery/electrical supply. we are just like that too, once our heart stop beating, we will not survive as well. anyway, the experience was really traumatic, i still couldn't forget the face of the person, the last stare of him, and his groaning before death. but i guess i will have to learn to be emotional detached because i will be facing more of this in the future.

mom and dad went back to johor again to take care of grandpa. i can actually go back as well because i have break for today. but i am just too exhausted to travel here and there. grandpa's condition is getting serious. at his age, i know we cant do anything much. but i really pray that he will be alright soon.

random

took a picture of something which i kept in my purse. i kept this sheet of paper there for quite some time for no special reason. but its one of the things that made me smile whenever i take a look at it. the pic looked quite blurry, but i hope the person who wrote this can recognise her own handwriting yea. haha. frankly, i miss those days. miss those crazy moments that we shared. i think i had started to settled in uni life. but still, somehow something is still missing. haha, i have no idea what is it. anyway, i am grateful for all the friends that i have now and also back in singapore.
exam is coming soon. it makes me miss the period before A's when we used to go to the park near boon keng to chill out when we are stressed ( or more accurate, when kh accompanied me when i was stressed) i think i wouldnt have made it through without this someone who is so blur, yet so nice. haha. kh, dun be too perasan yea :P sigh.

went to the park alone this morning ( and also evening). saw something very interesting :D spot what is on the lake. hehe :D i think the park is not a bad place to chill out. hehe.

note the frequency of me updating blog. i am just too lazy to study. ah!!!!!!!! go go go jia you!

Extremity

for the past few weeks, my feelings have been at two extremes. when i think of something, i feel extremely happy, and on the other hand, when i think of another thing, i feel extremely sad. sigh. i seriously need to reflect.

anyway, orientation for the juniors has started. after having yet another dilemma on deciding whether or not to become orientation officer (OGL) , i have ended up becoming the OO for group ONEders. the reason that motivates me to keep taking part in the activities is that my group members are really a bunch of fun people la, so unlike us last time. haha. but on the other hand, summative is coming soon, really soon. and i am so unprepared. pathology ,immunology, parasitology ,microbiology ,pharmacology, and community medicine. so much to study. ah!!

but something to look forward to , that is the trip to sg after summative :) :) :) cant wait to go back and visit around. work hard!

in memory of a friend

Things changed. Changed really fast. so much can happen in just a month time.

One month ago, she was still happily enjoying time with her family. but on the next day, she is gone. so sudden. so unpredictable.

i recalled the crazy moments that we had. the time when both of us walked along bukit timah late at nite, trying to explore the area around our hostel eventhough its really quite dangerous. the time when we first explore the mrt system in singapore and went blindly to orchard. the time when we go for lectures, tutorials and even toilets together. and the time when we had our class bbq at east coast. the time that we crazily go around hostel and took pics of the five star prison. the card that i made for u before u left singapore. and the farewell card that u wrote for me.

and i remember the time that i last sent u off to bus station in singapore when u were leaving back to penang. and now you left. really left us. and i couldnt send you off for the last time. but i am really thankful to be able to know you, although just for a very brief period. Rest in peace, nn.

pics!

Live your life each day as you would climb a mountain.
An occasional glance towards the summit keeps the goal in mind,
but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vantage point.
climb slowly, steadily, enjoying each new passing moment,
and the view from the summit will prove to be astonishing.
~Harold v.Melchert

At imu

At lunch site
At base camp

At the summit

Descending
at waterfall

me:)

down

defective lacrimal glands




which no doctors can cure




only time can heal them.



Grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change;
courage to change the things i can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Valentines Day

Another valentines day has passed. Valentines day without a valentine. sigh. i always wonder how does it feel to have ur loved one together on this very special day. but wait, i think everyday will be just like valentines day if you can spend it with ur loved one.

anyway, glad to have one bunch of good friends as company. although there is no roses or presents, the day was spent in a meaningful way :)

Mountain climbing

went for mountain climbing for the past two days. initially, i was really excited and looking forward to this trip as this would be my first hiking. but something happened last weekend and thus i was having a dilemma to decide whether i should still go on with my plan of hiking. in the end, i decided to go because life is short, i must really do what i want to do when i still have the chance. i have no regrets in making the decision as i really enjoyed the trip:)

venue: gunung besar hantu ( freaky name yea! haha, but thankfully we didnt meet any erm suspicious-weird-scary creatures)
characters: 17 of us from M207 batch, 10 girls and 7 guys,led by RM and Roderick, together with 2 guides

we departed from imu at around 8 plus on thursday nite. it was later than what we have planned. anyway, it started raining when we reached our destination. irony aint? coz gunung besar hantu is located in Jelebu, Negeri Sembilan, supposedly the driest area in Malaysia. and the plan was slightly affected as we now cannot set a tent outside. in the end, we all slept in a open space with a nice shelter somewhere near our supposed camping site. thankfully i manged to sleep a bit even with the snores at the background. the snores sound like a choir, with different pitch, volume.... haha :P

the next day, after breakfast, we headed to the police station at kampung chennah to park our cars there. thereafter, we took 4WD to bring us to the base of the mountain. the journey on 4WD was really exciting. the bumpy road really kill our ass! then we begin our hiking up the hill. torny plants, ferns, and the slopes toughen the hiking. but nevertheless, we made it through to the base camp and according to the guide, we are the fastest group ever :) :) :) so proud of myself. ahem, but felt bad also coz i am quite slow and this dragged the whole team down. sigh.

since we reached the base camp earlier than expected, the guide brought us to the nearest water source to bath. woa, the the cooling river water splashing on our body, bliss :) then the guys set up a camp fire and we also cook our food. all of us went to bed early as we have to wake up at 2am next day so that we manage to catch the first glimpse of sun rise. despite the 'flooded' tent, all of us slept well.

at 2am next day, we woke up and prepare breakfast. there after we left the base camp and started our hike up to the summit. it was really dark. and the path is really steep and dangerous. any mistake will cause tragedy. really thankful that izzat is infront of me, leading me all the way up and lending me a hand when i needed help. finally, at around 6am, we reached the summit!!! from there we can see lights of genting highland. standing at the height of 1492m peak, inhaling the cool breeze, the feeling is heaven. we crowd around the firepit as it is really very very cold up there while waiting for the sun rise. but to our disappointment, we didnt get to see sunrise because the mist is really very thick.

so we descend down to the base camp. the descending part is the part that i hated the most. i slipped all the way down as i see no point standing up coz i will end up slipping also. then before we go back , we went to the waterfall. oh man, it is the tallest waterfall that i have ever seen. i decided to sit at the stone and admire the nice breath taking sceneries while looking at the rest cam whoring :P

i learnt a lot from this hiking experience. and definitely gain precious friendship. as RM said, life is just like climbing mountain, there are ups and downs. but the important thing is that we are not facing it all by ourselves, we still have friends to support us. i really want to thank all those that went for the hike and help me throughout the hike. and thank you for adding this wonderful page in my life :)

stupidity

i committed so many stupid mistakes this few days.

first one happened during my patient interview.

venue:CSU
characters: between me and one indian middle-aged lady who is a super good simulated patient
time: 17jan morning

me: so how may i address u madam?
patient: MISS Lucy
me: oh, MISS Lucy, so how old are u?
patient: 40 years old
me: (stupidly) so are u married?
patient: why did u ask this question????!!!!! didnt i say i am MISSSSS Lucy. u were not listening!!!!!!

she looks really pissed. i must really compliment her good acting!!!
and the conversation continued with her shooting me. thankfully it was not an assessment. anyway, at the end of the 8mins interview, the patient gave me some really constructive comments. i guess it does help to prepare me a bit to face and handle with such situation in the future.

another incident happened during last nite's steamboat. it was soooo embarassing and i shall not elaborate more. but the moral of the story is ' do not give stupid suggestion coz u might end up doing it' sounds vague and confusing, but erm it is too embrassing that i wont post it here.

ice kacang!!!!

had ice kacang at one hawker center ytd after a breezy night jog:) it just feels so nice to have a bowl of ice kacang when u are feeling stressed. all the stress will just evaporate with every taste of that ice kacang.

rmb the days where we used to walk all the way from hostel to adam hawker center just to have a nice yummy ice kacang. the cold ice kacang and the warm company, just feel so right:) anyway, i still prefer the one at bugis and the one at lao pa sat. hehe. how i wish they will have ice kacang at the mamak downstairs. then i will be able to eat it whenever i feel stressed.

stress is in the air now. with pa-toe/patho-. and immu-no. unfortunately, pa-toe is not as interesting as pah-toh. haha. and i just cant believe i have a lecturer who treats pathology as his first love.

looking forward to chinese new year~ two more weeks:)

friends.

i sooooo agree with kah hwee's post友情篇

sometimes, knowing more friends doesnt seem to be a good thing, ok ok, i know i sound like a loner/AS . but to think of it, i really enjoy that 2 years of junior college in sg more than ever compared to the life here. and the main reason is friends. back there, having the company of friends, sharing joy and sadness with friends really help to relieve my home-sick-ness. here, i know a lot more friends, but somehow, the feeling is very different. not that the friends here are not nice, some of them are really very nice. but hmm...i duno how to put it in words. haiz. i think i m feeling the same thing as kh. but i hope things will get better, sooner or later it will.

and i MISSSSSS home now. ah.

and yea, i really miss those days. it has been three years or 2 and a half years knowing these bunch of crazy friends. and funny thing is, i kept smiling when reading that post, and reminiscing the good old days,hope hy didn see that and thinks that i m a freak. haha.

Virus!

studying virus.

and laptop infected with virus!!!!!! :( :( :(

ah!!

happily ever after :D

Haha, is there such thing in real world? i think it doesnt happen all the time, but sometimes, it does. Enchanted is nice :) the ending, just like every fairy tales, happily ever after. funny and romantic, exactly what i need now.

heh, went out this aftn to meet jh in mv. met up with jade and leanne as well.ah. the joy of meeting old friends after long time. if only everyday is like that, stress-free, going out, enjoying life~ but then its quite impossible, just like 'happily-ever-after' heh. i am obviously crapping here.

first lecture of microbiology was intimidating. i think it was supposed to be intimidating coz the two lecturers kept saying foundation2 is going to be very tough. looking at all those long names of bacteria, i am so turned off. wondered why they cant just name it bacteria A /B /C... or just ah lian, ah beng...and apparently we are supposed to memorise them all. ah!

counting down to cny...1 more month. whee...

Happy new year!

tick tick tick, its 12am! whee, happy new year. and there after i went to sleep, didn even bother to look at the fireworks outside the window. i guess i am too tired. haha.

2007 has been a great year, but i know 2008 will be better.

new year resolution:
eat less
study more
smile and laugh more, be more optimistic

heh, sounds easy, but its not!

had 2 dimsum breakfast and its soooo delicious, especially the one in sri petaling :) :) :) but oh well, good food comes with a good price as well. sigh. shall eat less after this or else i wont be able to fit into all the cloths i bought this few days. after few days of shopping, me and dad have came to a conclusion that shopping is not that fun after all. heh, one thing, we need to pay! $$$ duh! erm , another thing is its sooo tiring! i think studying is even less tiring. haha. and pity my dad, his legs are all swollen ( oedema???) after the shopping. ah. but then , really happy that i bought so many nice cloths!!! :) :) :)

parents are back to ktn. start to miss home already. cant wait to go back during cny.

wedding!

went for my bro's friend's wedding dinner the other day. haha. the guy is actually the best man during my bro's wedding. thats how i got to know him :P

i guess wedding day is the most significant day for couples. the day which their love fruits, the day that everyone sends their blessing to them, the day which both of them will share a new life together.

since young, i have always dream to have a grand wedding.nice elegant gown, high class hotel, sparkling diamond ring, to be precise, the best of everything :) :) :). walking down the aisle, all other girls look at me enviously as i approach my handsome mr right. heh. childish aint? till now, i still look forward to that grand wedding of mine :P but i guess it wont be in anytime soon. maybe erm, 10/15 years later? heh. i think by then i will have wrinkles all over my face. oh well, thats inevitable. maybe i should start using cosmetic products now :P haha.

although i look forward to the wedding day, i think the life after wedding will be very different and not easy with so many things to adapt. to accommodate another individual in your life, to take care of him/her regardless of anything.

i think to actually stay together with someone for a lifetime is not as easy as it seems. this year will be my parents' 30th wedding anniversary. i really respect them for being able to maintain the relationship so well. erm, although can hear them argue over small things everyday, i think thats how they spice up the relationship and its their way of interaction :P

hmm, really look forward to see one of my close friends getting married. wonder who will be the first one :) :) :)

ah, i want to watch Enchanted!

holidays!

wohoo..
sadly, its not a long one ,nevertheless i enjoyed every moment of it :) :) :) just right after summative, i went to midvalley to meet up with kh. talking about summative, couldnt say i did very well, neither did i do badly, erm, but i believe i can do better, of course with more mugging and studying.

anyway, met up with kh in mv, and the two of us went to garden's robinson to look for leanne coz she is working part time there. trying to be funny, we even typed her name on the high-tech search engine in the garden's. haha. we went from floor to floor looking for her, and to realise that robinson is actually not that small. and with fate, we eventually managed to find her. luckily she choose to go to toilet at the correct timing (=.=') , or else we wouldnt have found her since she is working at the customer service. bugging her again after so long was fun :P after that i rushed back to my apartment because bro is coming to fetch me back to kuantan!

yay! back to kuantan! :) :) :) :) :) nice food, bed, pillow, tv and most importantly, my dearest family :) went to jh's house and had a great chat with her and sw. and they gave me a belated bday present :) thanks guys! i really love the blouse. oh, not forgetting the earrings too.

there after, i went back to segamat. mom had a great mouth exercising :P haha. and i had a great drama marathon :) coffee prince is nice!!!! oh man, the ending is really very very very very very very sweet. *hint* haha. oh, and managed to meet up with sl as well, not very long though.

and on christmas, me,sw,ww celebrated bday for jh and yf. and i made THE kuih batik for them, and i guess it was a successful one :D we went for a dinner at e&e . fattening but nice! ahha.there after went to TC and the last actv of the nite was MOVIE! haha. i think i havent stepped into a cinema since i started uni, but dun get the wrong impression, foundation1 wasnt that busy, just that i wasted my time nowhere. heh. National treasure2 is great. but most of the time i was fighting hard not to fall asleep because it was already 12 plus midnite. yes, that was the first time i stay out so late. and first time i reach home with my parents already sleeping. anyway, the movie is a worth watching one :)

and the past two days, another movie marathon!! 转角遇到爱。 main actor is handsome! haha. but i would say the whole drama is a bit too draggy. maybe i am too impatient. and now i had finished all the dramas i have. free. free. nothing to do. free. free. i shall enjoy this free time, coz looking at foundation2 timetable, the schedule will be quite pack. ah. ah. ah. maybe i should watch stardust now. :P

going to meet up with my sec school classmates tonite. looking forward to it, coz i havent seen many of them post spm, and that was like 3 years ago? haha. just realised i am that old.

oh before i forget, merry xmas and happy new year :) :) :)

It begins with You

Acceptance VS Rejection
Equalization VS Stigmatization
Hope VS Fear

Which would you choose for a HIV Positive patient?

went for a HIV awareness talk today. it enlightened me about HIV and how society is treating these HIV patients.

HIV is not curable at the moment. But it is not a death sentence either. Even though they carry the virus in them, they to can lead a normal healthy life with the advancement of medical care. why is the society ostracizing them? Why can't we just treat this as any other illnesses in the world.

What if, unfortunately, you or someone that u know is infected with this virus? How will you react? Think twice before u answer. So many people with HIV out there are not depressed because of the illness, they are in despair due to how society and people around them view them.

What these people with HIV want is to be given a chance, and not sympathy. You can make a difference. Play your part. we should understand and try to accept them as part of the society. After all, they do have eyes, heart, lungs, liver... Stop discriminating HIV people. HIV doesn't kill, but discrimination kills.

It begins with you.

Oh no!!!!

have a look at this:

the star

such a great news, isn't it?
aaahhh!!!!
so that means that i still have 10 more years to go. yippie ! i m sooo looking forward to it.

Patient Interview

tomorrow is the day! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. wish me luck .
another one will be on friday.ah ah ah ah ah ah

镜子

镜子里的她
已不如从前的她

那灿烂的笑容
那快乐的眼神
那自信的脸孔
已消失了

这是长大的代价吗？
长大真的是那么辛苦吗。。。

smile, girl!

Again, and again.
Yet again and again.
Again again and again.

i hope i will be alright. I NEED to be alright.
Smile, girl.

cooking

i have been cooking quite a lot lately. erm, i mean more than zero. haha. this is partially due to the changing of new caterer in the canteen in my uni. now a plate of normal mixed rice costs so much compared to the old caterer! and to add salt to the wound, now the vendor who used to sell curry-puff outside my apartment also has gone nowhere to be seen. weird!

anyway, i resorted in cooking to protect my stomach.( side note: i am supposed to be revising my lecture notes on gastrointestinal tract and i am here slacking around.) so i cooked a few meals, namely egg with sausage, cabbage soup, peanut soup. don't ask me how did the food become edible, but trust me, it is edible :D and i would rate it as above average.hehe. and ww also taught me cheese baked rice, just like the one at kim gary's.haha. i must try it out one day. its kinda simple, marinate some chicken/pork, grill it and cook some rice, arrange the layer of cheese on top of the chicken, put it in oven and wait till it become golden brownish. yummmy!!! yea, the thought of this made my salivary gland secretes saliva.haha.

besides that, some interesting thing the kampung serendah visit. it is a orang asli village at serendah.duh. haha. erm, the village is not as bad as i thought, at least they do have ASTRO. yes, astro. and i dun have la! but some of the kids are quite poor thing, they walk around bare-footed, because they were used to it since young. we were supposed to instill awareness in them and teach about hygiene. besides giving out goodie bag, we also had a eye check for the adult and those that are short/long sighted will be prescribed spectacles. the visit ended quite well (although i had sunburn the nite after we came back,heh) took lots of pic as well! :)

and yea! will be going back kuantan tomorrow :D :D :D :D :D :D in a holiday mood already! ahah

kidney!!

topic of the week: renal system.

the main function of the kidney is to excrete waste products out of our body and conserve useful useful materials.

can the brain functions like kidney? filtering out all unnecessary materials. i wonder. but i guess the answer is no, since my brain is always filled with rubbish.

心

人之心
是多么的复杂
多么的弱
多么的难了解

一一解剖
那心
得来的
却是伤痕累累

my mandarin level really deteriorates. i mean not that my english is improving, i think i am facing problems for all my languages. gosh, i cant even write simple mandarin words!!

Fluff~

Recently i am addicted to an application in the facebook. its called fluff friends. there i adopted a fluff, and named it cutie :P haha. anyway, it is a rabbit, which they call it leppit. funny right? anyway, i am not a animal lover. just addicted in playing the fluff race in this application which we can bet and earn munny ( money ) from there. here are the details of the fluff. haha.

Type:	Leppit
Mood:	huggable
Saying:	"i love cherries and milk~" edit
Speed:	309 fph race

the mood will change automatically and i have no idea it depends on what. and the speed will increase if we feed the fluff food/drinks. we will need munny to buy those food to feed them. haha. i duno why i am wasting my time in this childish thing, but its fun!

i don't know what has happened to me recently, but i am like a purposeless and soulless person. waking up every morning, going for lecture, eat, sleep..... but without purpose. i have no idea what is going on in me, but it is happening. something is wrong. very wrong. :(

Eventful weekend~

Had a very eventful weekend, although that means not much studies done, i felt very satisfied. On friday, just after lecture, i went out together with wy,jeannie and some others for curry mee outing. haha. the journey there itself was very funny. after venturing for around 30mins, and with the help of some kind soul only did we manage to find the famous curry mee shop. there are many newspaper cutting pasted around the shop, which also means it appears in newspaper many times. so, the lucky me got to eat the famous laksa,thanks to wy and her sis :)

after the curry mee outing, i rushed back to vista to play ping pong with ww. we wanted to play on friday afternoon coz many 'apeks' ( old man) will be playing at this time. and oh man, they are really very very good despite of their age. so, walking in the court with our thick face, we asked the uncle to teach us and let us practise together. They are very nice people and one of them started teaching us. he is really like a real coach, looking at us practising and comment on any mistake that we made. But our skills were really bad, so he had to teach us from the basic, which is practising strokes. anyway, it was really nice learning from them. i decided to really commit myself in this sports and will spare out every friday and learn from this nice old people.

On saturday, i went to St jerome's home with few others to tutor the orphans there. because this is the first time i go there, so i really don't know what to expect. Luckily the whole thing turned out alright. anyway, we started of interacting with the kids there, some of them are really small, as in 3 years old and some are like 20 years old. because some of the kids went to school for activity, the few of us were able to give personal attention to each kids and tutor them with full attention. i tutor one girl who just finished her Pmr. so i decided to do some maths revision with her since it is better to build a good foundation before form4. so i started with Pythagoras Theorem. anyway, i spent the whole session teaching her squaring of numbers because i realised her basics are not very good. after the whole tutoring session, somehow i felt very thankful to have a happy and healthy environment for me to grow. or else i would not become what i am today.

In the evening, i was invited by yh to some cultural perfomances organised by MCA in conjunction with their 50th anniversary at bukit jalil stadium. It is some sort of event to promote chinese cultural so that it will not diminish in this modern world of today. anyway, i promised to go because there is FREE food provided ( i know i know, i am such a despo :P ). i called along ww and jeannie because yh gave me 4 extra tickets. the ticket each costs rm30 but then we don't need to pay anything because yh's dad already paid for it. the night was really fun, with good food and nice perfomances. i also got to see prime minister and many other political figures in that event. besides, i got to see Michael wong（光良）his voice is really very very nice. not forgetting era fazirra who just got engaged/married this week. she is so pretty and her voice is nice too.

Today, sunday i went to uni because i sign up to become tour guide of imu open day :) me and jeannie were loiterring around because there werent anyone for us to bring around. so we waited there and until one family came, so two of us started our tour. and do u believe it, we spent our whole shift bringing this family around the uni. the most interesting part of the tour was in csu. that was the 2nd time i been into csu. there were a lot of demostrations by our seniors, such as rectal examination, breast examination, BP taking, pap's smear, etc. it was very enlightening. and after the tour, our senior showed us how to take BP manually. i still vividly remember how to take , but still i learn a lot of new thing from the seniors. so today was really very fruitful, not only i learn a lot of new stuff, i also got free lunch& rm15!!! haha. yea.

haha, what a long post. U can see i am really very free.

insomnia

11pm: go to sleep
12am: still awake
start counting
1 sheep
2 sheeps
3 sheeps
4 sheeps
5 sheeps

suddenly remember something else~ the space btw visceral pleura and parietal pleura is call pleura cavity and is important to reduce the friction when lungs are moving during ventilation.bla bla bla bla bla.

12.05am: start counting again
1 sheep
2 sheeps

distracted again.......
this goes on and on and on and on and on for many many days.
i have became more and more like panda.a panda with mushroom hairstyle.
i am not stressed.why should i be.no reason.no valid reason at least.

by the way, i am back from kuantan after 1 week of break and had mushroom hairstyle now. heartache after cutting my long nice hair~but at least i can save a lot of shampoo and conditioner now:) haven't had hair as short as this since sec2. i hope a new hairstyle can give me a brand new life. a better life.a happier life ( although its a mushroom hairstyle)

Question

Haven't i thought of this question many times?
Should I or should I not?
Can u tell me?
Please.

After 12am~ again...

I just received a email from future.me. it is something that i wrote last year. i remember this website was introduced to me by kh. and that time sitting infront of library's comp, i wrote something and sent it to myself in the future. cool right. i totally forgotten about this and here it comes the email.

Dear FutureMe, 
here i am,in singapore,3 days before my 19th birthday.duno where i will 
celebrating my 20th,21st....bday and with who..24 days before my a levels, make 
or break is not only determined by this few days.but this few left over days 
i must really jia you so that at the time i read this i wont regret,because 
I HAVE TRIED MY BEST.

some parts of the letter had been edited due to some personal reasons. anyway, now 
that i have the answers for questions that i had last year, i shall answer them. I remember last year
at this very time i was very lost, duno anything about my future, duno where i will
end up in,the course that i will take,etc. i applied to many universities in uk, us and got accepted
into all of them, but in the end i chose not to go. how i wish i could send all these answers back to
1 year ago. then i wouldnt need to worry so much.sigh.

so here i am, back in my hometown celebrating my birthday. and will soon go back to
imu next week to continue with the course of my own choice. as for a levels, i think i had
tried my best. and even i didnt manage to achieve the perfect results which i aim for,
i am thankful for my results.

and on the side note, thank you
1. to my imu friends who gave me a surprise celebration. that was really very surprising!!!
2. to kh and px for the day!! :D
3. to my family( although they will not read this ) for celebrating with me on this very day
4. and to all my friends who still remember me and also my birthday and willing to waste the time
money to message me or wish me one way or another.

Thank you so much. i would not say it is the best one, but i am very grateful to be able to be
at home on this very day together with my loved ones.

After 12am~

Why do i feel so sad now?
Why the tears are dropping continuously?
On this very day. 15 mins after 12 am.
Why?
Cheer up please! u can do it !
Wake up and greet ur big day with a big fat smile.

Intersection point

"A place where things intersect, especially a place where two or more roads cross" -- definition from free dictionary.com

Will there be one intersection point in the future? i always wonder. If there is not, why bother wasting all the time, money, and even tears now?

But why worry with something that u cannot take control over? especially if it is something that is not going to happen in near future. ah, life.

jargon!

I remember some professor said that we will learn a lot of medical jargons throughout our medical journey on the first few briefing. I just cant believe that what she said is true. It is really A LOT!!!

Just being in foundation1, i have been exposed to so many medical jargons. Just the names in muscular system is enough to kill me. imagine having to memorise all the muscles, extensor-carpi-radialis-longus, sternocleidomastoid. i really have to agree with one joke that another professor made, that is the name of the muscle are even longer than the muscle itself! at least this joke make me laugh at all the long names of the muscles when i am having a tough time to memorise them all.

sometimes, it is kinda demoralizing to look at the text book and not understand the whole chapter. there are too many jargons and terms to remember. maybe i should really try replacing my pillow with my lovely text book. miracle may happen and maybe the facts in the text book will flow from higher concentration(text book) to lower concentration(mybrain,of course!), according to principle of osmosis. haha.

somebody help me. save my poor small brain!!!!

Uni Life~

6 weeks of uni life wasn't very bad, at least not as hectic as i have expected. There are not as much lectures as in jc, and there is no tutorial either. Now i kinda miss those time that we have three or four continuous assessments/tests every week, at least it keeps me motivated to study. haha, yes, i am those type of person that will only study under pressure. I remember i kept complaining last time due to the insane tests,cant believe i actually miss them now.

Today is the recruitment drive for CCA. it is very much tone down compared to those in jc. The booths set up are sooo different. There are no free gifts, no interesting presentation....ok ok, i shall stop comparing and complaining. I took part in 2 clubs and 2 sports. i guess it wont be as tiring as those in jc. Maybe after first or second sem, i will quit one of them.

Anyway, i am going to have one week holiday. wheeeee~ cant wait to go back home. home is nearer to me now, i miss home more though compare to last time. and yes, i am going to celebrate my birthday at home this year! yea, finally, after two years :D

Blood~

Whee~ i just donated my first 350ml of blood. Not much pain involved, but the needle is really really very thick. Didn't know that the blood of people who has slow reaction ( me!! ) also flow very slow. The guy beside me who started 20minutes later than me finished donating one packet 10minutes faster than me!!!! my blood flows slower than other people. sob sob. But i guess its not a bad thing, at least when i have injury, i will not lose my blood so fast. hehe :P anyway, my 'first time' donating blood was quite ok :) too bad they don't provide the smiley face plasters like those in Singapore.